Sometimes I hear from others that my experience, my life, appears to be a challenging one. I have yet to witness a life without a challenge and so I often smile in reply. The follow-up comment, which never fails to turn my lips downward with discernment is that “they” could not do it, be in my shoes and tend to a family member with special needs.

Nonsense.

Any of us can. Many of us do.

My son Davis is the Thirty-Third Child in the world to be diagnosed with The Phelan-McDermid Syndrome (PMS), a deletion on the twenty-second chromosome. While his condition is rare, in the United States 1 in 45 children are diagnosed with autism. 1 in 323 children are diagnosed with cerebral palsy (a global term for poor body movement attributed to the brain), and 2.2 million people live with epilepsy, a figure that jumps to 65 million worldwide.

Many of us can and do live with the challenge of special needs.

I offer my story as the map I did not have.   A tale about the slow sweet surrender some learn early, some late, and some miss because they cannot re-direct their hopes and dreams for their child, for their family, for their own journey. I did not choose the life behind door number two. It chose me. I could have done many of these written moments better had I been less frightened, less fatigued, less human. Had I chosen the honesty of tears over the disguise of humor. But authenticity requires courage. Courage comes when we embrace our situation, accept what limitations cannot be changed, and strive to better the remaining opportunities left in the wake of disability.

Sometimes I hear from others that my experience, my life, appears to be a challenging one. I have yet to witness a life without a challenge and so I often smile in reply. The follow-up comment, which never fails to turn my lips downward with discernment is that “they” could not do it, be in my shoes and tend to a family member with special needs.

Nonsense.

Any of us can. Many of us do.

My son Davis is the Thirty-Third Child in the world to be diagnosed with The Phelan-McDermid Syndrome (PMS), a deletion on the twenty-second chromosome. While his condition is rare, in the United States 1 in 45 children are diagnosed with autism. 1 in 323 children are diagnosed with cerebral palsy (a global term for poor body movement attributed to the brain), and 2.2 million people live with epilepsy, a figure that jumps to 65 million worldwide.

Many of us can and do live with the challenge of special needs.

I offer my story as the map I did not have.   A tale about the slow sweet surrender some learn early, some late, and some miss because they cannot re-direct their hopes and dreams for their child, for their family, for their own journey. I did not choose the life behind door number two. It chose me. I could have done many of these written moments better had I been less frightened, less fatigued, less human. Had I chosen the honesty of tears over the disguise of humor. But authenticity requires courage. Courage comes when we embrace our situation, accept what limitations cannot be changed, and strive to better the remaining opportunities left in the wake of disability.

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